July 4th will never be the same for me. It was a life-changing day.

I wish I could tell you how the day went, but the truth is, I honestly have no memory of even attending a party. I remember getting ready that morning, and that’s it. Nothing more.

My husband later told me that I got up from the table to go to the bathroom and was gone for a while. He knew something wasn’t right, so he went to look for me. When the bathroom door would not open and I was not answering, he forced it open and found me on the floor. I was blue and not breathing.

He cleared my airway, and the color began to return to my body. Someone called 911, and within minutes the paramedics arrived. I was taken by ambulance to University of Maryland Upper Chesapeake Emergency Room in Bel Air, Maryland.

On the way to the hospital, I aspirated. By the time I arrived, I had pneumonia. My heart stopped three times, and the medical team performed CPR and brought me back. I became septic and was transferred to the ICU, where I was placed in a medically induced coma and put on a ventilator. They also discovered a blood clot in my lung.

On July 14, I woke up terrified and confused. I did not understand why I was lying in a hospital bed, why my hands were tied down, or why I could not speak because of the tube in my throat. My husband said, “Welcome back, sleeping beauty,” and asked if I knew what day it was. I shook my head no. The nurses asked me too, and again I did not know. As my husband explained what had happened, all I could do was cry.

My children and my parents came to see me, and I still did not fully understand what was going on. It took two more days before I was strong enough to have the tube removed. On July 18, I was discharged from the ICU and transferred to a regular room. Within 24 hours, I was discharged to a rehab facility, where I spent six days.

My entire goal was to return home, and I did whatever I had to do to get there. Learning to walk again and do stairs was one of the hardest parts of rehab, but one of the most freeing moments was taking a shower and washing my own hair. After lying in a bed for 19 days, I needed that more than I can explain.

To this day, we still do not know why I passed out in that bathroom. That uncertainty has shaken me and scared me, and for months I lived with the fear of what if it happens again. But over time, I have found peace in knowing that God has me in His hands and will protect me.

This experience changed me completely, not just physically but mentally and emotionally too. Sepsis affects every part of your life. My advice to other survivors is to have a strong support system around you and do your best to explain to your family how you are feeling and what is going on. Not everyone will understand, and some people may remove themselves from your circle. That is okay. You are a warrior, and you survived.

My ICU team at University of Maryland Upper Chesapeake were amazing. I call them my angels. I later returned to the ICU with snacks, stickers to bring a little comedy to their day, notepads and pens, and angel wing bracelets for the team who cared for me. I will be forever grateful for them.

I am also grateful for how quickly everyone responded that day. What could have been a complicated family situation became a moment where people came together to help save my life, and I will never forget that.

I returned to work on August 4. There were things I had to think through differently, and making notes helped bring back some of the memories from before July 4. That day will always be a blur to me, and I have accepted that I may never know the reason why it all unfolded the way it did.

That moment in time is in the past. I am looking forward and on to better things. I am grateful to be here today, enjoying this life with my children, grandchildren, family, and friends.